James and I first got chickens in 2020 when we lived in a suburb outside of Edinburgh. Our setup back then was a big run under some large trees and a small chicken house. The run was furnished with woodchips. When we were in the garden, the chickens were free to roam (unless the dogs were with us). They often got fresh vegetables as treats and whenever we were gardening we would toss cut weeds into the run for them to decimate. This felt like a high-security arrangement. The run was enclosed and we were right next to a golf course. The only breach we ever had involved the neighbour’s dog digging in. Fortunately, some golfers on the other side saw what was happening and intervened. I wasn’t there, but I’m told the chickens defended themselves admirably and ultimately escaped to higher ground where the spaniel could not follow. Miraculously, they all survived.
Glenshellish was a different story altogether.
We are surrounded by long-grassed wilderness. There are pine martens, one of the worst chicken predators you can encounter in the UK. There are also plenty of birds of prey. Mostly hawks, but also white-tailed eagles (yes, I have actually seen one here at Glenshellish).
When we first moved, I quite literally put the chickens in the garage while I tried to figure something out. I was slightly paralysed by the scale of the danger.
By now, I’ve accepted that letting them truly free-range will always involve risk. But watching them wander across the farm, living their best lives and doing chicken things wherever they deem chicken things to be best done, is worth it. Our chicken setup now strikes a balance of giving them complete freedom during the day and a high security house at twilight and night.
I am entirely obsessed with chickens and could write about them all day. If there is anything you’re particularly curious about when it comes to how we live with ours, let me know.
For now, I simply want to introduce them. Yes, I am still at the stage where they all have names and I know all their personalities.
This round-up is as of February 2026. There was another chicken whose story is told in “this post”.
Schmeckls
A sleek, mean killing machine.
She is the only chicken I have ever seen kill and eat mice. If that sounds horrifying, let me assure you I did not enjoy witnessing it. But it speaks to her character, so it feels important to include.
She is also the queen of the flock and a surprisingly magnanimous leader. The main reason I haven’t introduced a rooster yet, which would help with some of my security concerns, is that she manages group dynamics extremely well.
Dora
Named after Dora the Explorer because when she first arrived she was the most comfortable exploring the garden.
Since then she has developed into a solid, low-drama, all-rounder chicken who generally stays with the flock and behaves sensibly. I can only imagine the chaos that would ensue if the others were to lose her stabilising influence.
Rory
Rory is named after Rory in Gilmore Girls, and she is annoying in exactly the same way.
She brings a high and entirely unnecessary level of stress to any situation. She is extremely flighty. Good luck catching her. What she lacks in social confidence she makes up for in beauty.
Esme
Named after Esme Weatherwax. She has a dark energy about her and is missing a toe. She is not particularly interested in what the other chickens or humans are doing. She prefers to take herself on small, solitary adventures.
She has a pendulous crop for which she should technically be wearing a crop bra. After a couple of attempts, however, she made it abundantly clear that we would not be doing that again.
I suspect she could curse someone if she cared to.
Bernadette
Bernadette is an escape artist.
When we first got her and quarantined her with her two sisters, she broke out repeatedly. On one occasion she made it all the way across the farm to the workshop, where a heroic WWOOFer managed to catch her mid-flight.
She enjoys being picked up and moved through the air like an aeroplane.
She has a specific spot in the workshop where she prefers to lay her eggs in private, and every morning when they are released from the coop she heads straight there. It is nice to see a chicken with such determination.
Mapou
Mapou keeps going for my coffee. At any given point she is either harassing me or off exploring the land. She probably strays the furthest. I have retrieved her from the woodland, the upper field, the forestry path, and more.
Fittingly, she is best friends with Esme. I strongly suspect they exchange information about new adventuring spots.
Hey-Hey
Hey-Hey came to us from a less than ideal situation and her feathers still haven’t fully grown back. Her most admirable quality is her commitment to my goat bedding experiment, where I periodically send the chickens in to scratch and turn the self-composting bedding before mucking out.
Lately she has been so broody that I am approaching the point where I may simply give her some eggs to hatch.
